I have spent the last 12 years shooting over 150 weddings so believe me I have seen what can happen and cause couples to miss out on being present on their wedding day. That is why I have written up 5 tips to help you make time for the important moments on your wedding day so that doesn’t happen to you.
After your wedding when you have your photos in your hand, not only will you be able to look back at those moments, but you will also be able to feel what that moment was like. When you are trying to make sure everything is smooth on wedding days it is hard not to try to answer all those last minute questions, but when you’re trying to make sure everything is going smoothly you are missing out on being in the moment and taking it all in.
Here are my 5 tips to make sure you have time to be present and feel all the things that will bring you joy and connection when you look back at your photos:
1. Delegate and hand over the day of schedule (if you don’t have one I highly recommend making one). Take time to type out everything for the day that you can possibly think of such as when and where the flowers will arrive along with the contact numbers for the florist, basically all the important phone numbers of everyone should be on this list… this will take you time so try to be organized way ahead of the wedding week with this stuff. Give this list to someone who will be your go to on the day (and be sure their number is handed over to all of the vendors to contact rather than call you) of that way if things are delayed etc you will never know unless you need to know so you can sit back and just be in the moments. It is best to communicate this information with all your vendors as well. For example if the marriage commissioner needs the best man’s address they should call him so letting the commissioner have contact information for everyone on their paperwork ahead of time is best rather than them calling you on your wedding day for you to have to make another 2 phone calls when you should be drinking those mimosas with your girls.
2. Have a solid wedding day timeline but also be flexible enough for when things go a bit sideways. One of my biggest pieces of advice to my couples is to ask your hair/makeup to actually start 30-45 minutes before you actually thought you needed and then for the rest of the day add in 15 minutes more for each portion of the day that way if things start to unravel on your timeline in the morning you have the wiggle room so you don’t need to stress. If you are travelling between venues before the ceremony add on an additional 15 minutes of travel in the event of delays especially during those wonderful construction months! However it is more ideal to have all your locations as close together to spend less time travelling and more quality time with your loved ones. Be sure to share your timeline plan with all your vendors.
3. Be strategic on the layout of your day. If you want a quality visit with your guests consider a first look so that post ceremony you can pop right into cocktail hour mode. Having a first look allows you to get all your photos complete prior to the ceremony minus a few family ones that way you can do a few “just married” photos and head straight into cocktail hour to visit your guests. If you don’t have a first look plan to skip the receiving line and head straight into photos so that you can still arrive early at the reception. A receiving line will generally take 15-30 minutes (sometimes longer). I have had couples do a reception entry receiving line which makes for great photos, one of my most memorable ones was a couple who had a ton of paper airplanes for the guests to toss as they arrived.
4. Don’t have a lot of reception games that don’t involve the guests. Reception games are great but when there are too many you will not be spending as much time interacting with your guests. If you have your heart set on a few consider spreading them out so that you have time in between to visit as a lot of the older people generally leave earlier on in the evening so you want to be sure to make time to enjoy their company while they are there.
5. Take 5 minutes at the reception to go to the back or corner of the room with your groom, just the two of you to look at what is happening, look at who all is there celebrating with you. This is a great way for you to visually see it all so that you can remember what it looked like, what that felt like seeing those people in that room together. Remember that this is the only time this exact group of people will be together and you want to enjoy it all.
Most importantly this day happens so fast so letting the little things get to you will leave you with regret that you didn’t just roll with it all. So plan well with intention to make time for the moments that matter.